Close your eyes, take a breath and imagine for a minute that at 15, 18, 23 you’ve just been told you have cancer or that your 5 year old has cancer. What do you feel? Think? Do you understand? Are you devastated? Feel a little stunned, confused, out of control? Now imagine feeling those same feelings every day for the next six months, two years, five years while you receive treatment, while you watch someone you love go through the very real possibility that they could die, that you could die at 15.
I’ve sat down to write for the last five night’s and just stared at the page. I kind of lost my sense of what to write and definetely my ability to know what to say.
I am preparing for a big change in the next week or so and I’m not sure how I feel yet, I’ve been extremely stressed for a combination of reasons and at a bit of a loss as to the way forward and what to do to work through those emotions. Do you ever find yourself just wanting to cry in the most random situations? It’s a normal reaction to ignoring what you’re really thinking and feeling for so long I know, but it still sucks.